200 Funny Technology Jokes & Quotes [2025]

Technology has transformed the way we live, work, and connect—but let’s be honest, it also gives us plenty to laugh about. From glitchy software updates to autocorrect fails and virtual meetings gone hilariously wrong, the tech world is full of comic gold. At DigitalDefynd, where we explore both the cutting edge and the quirks of innovation, we believe a good laugh is just as essential as the latest gadget.

This curated collection of funny technology jokes and quotes is a light-hearted take on the everyday frustrations, absurdities, and ironies that come with our digital lives. Whether you’re a programmer drowning in semicolons, a manager bewildered by the cloud, or just someone whose printer never works when needed, you’ll find something here that hits close to home. These wisecracks and witticisms don’t just entertain—they reflect our collective journey through screens, codes, and the occasional system crash.

200 Funny Technology Jokes & Quotes [2025]

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31. “Machines take me by surprise with great frequency.” — Alan Turing, Father of Modern Computing

32. “Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of tapes hurtling down the highway.” — Andrew S. Tanenbaum, Computer Scientist

33. “You can’t have great software without a great team, and most software teams behave like dysfunctional families.” — Jim McCarthy, Software Engineer and Author

34. “If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.” — Edsger Dijkstra, Mathematician and Programmer

35. “Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.” — Joseph Campbell, Mythologist and Writer

36. “We are all now connected by the Internet, like neurons in a giant brain.” — Stephen Hawking, Theoretical Physicist

37. “Technology is just a tool. In terms of getting the kids working together and motivating them, the teacher is the most important.” — Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft

38. “There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in their home.” — Ken Olsen, Founder of Digital Equipment Corporation

39. “Technology should improve your life… not become your life.” — Harvey Mackay, Business Author

40. “The most dangerous phrase in technology is: ‘We’ve always done it this way.’” — Grace Hopper, Computer Scientist and Rear Admiral

41. “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge… and autocorrect.” — Stephen Hawking, Theoretical Physicist (humorously extended)

42. “Technology is a word that describes something that doesn’t work yet.” — Douglas Adams, Author of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

43. “Even in the technical community, some people don’t want the facts to interfere with their beliefs.” — Vint Cerf, Co-inventor of the Internet

44. “If the code and the comments do not match, possibly both are incorrect.” — Norm Schryer, Mathematician and Programmer

45. “The future is already here — it’s just not very evenly distributed.” — William Gibson, Cyberpunk Author

46. “Never memorize something that you can look up.” — Albert Einstein, Theoretical Physicist

47. “A year spent in artificial intelligence is enough to make one believe in God.” — Alan Perlis, Computer Scientist

48. “Computing is not about computers anymore. It is about living.” — Nicholas Negroponte, MIT Media Lab Founder

49. “The most compelling reason for most people to buy a computer for the home will be to link it into a nationwide communications network.” — Steve Jobs, Co-founder of Apple Inc.

50. “There are only two kinds of programming languages: those people always bitch about and those nobody uses.” — Bjarne Stroustrup, Creator of C++

51. “If you think your users are idiots, only idiots will use it.” — Linus Torvalds, Creator of Linux

52. “The cheapest, fastest, and most reliable components of a computer system are those that aren’t there.” — Gordon Bell, Engineer and Researcher

53. “Everything that can be invented has been invented.” — Charles H. Duell, Commissioner of U.S. Patent Office (often humorously misattributed)

54. “We wanted flying cars, instead we got 140 characters.” — Peter Thiel, Entrepreneur and Investor

55. “The key to artificial intelligence has always been the representation.” — Jeff Hawkins, Neuroscientist and Technologist

56. “In the digital age, privacy must be a priority. Is it just me, or is secret data collection kind of creepy?” — Kara Swisher, Tech Journalist

57. “Software is eating the world.” — Marc Andreessen, Entrepreneur and VC

58. “It’s not a bug. It’s an undocumented feature.” — Anonymous, Attributed to many early Microsoft developers

59. “Computers are magnificent tools for the realization of our dreams, but no machine can replace the human spark of spirit, compassion, love, and understanding.” — Louis Gerstner, Former CEO of IBM

60. “Every great developer you know got there by solving problems they were unqualified to solve until they actually did it.” — Patrick McKenzie, Software Entrepreneur and Writer

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61. “The reason it seems that price is all your customers care about is that you haven’t given them anything else to care about.” — Seth Godin, Marketing Expert and Author

62. “Technology over technique produces emotionless design.” — Daniel Mall, Designer and Creative Director

63. “Don’t worry if it doesn’t work right. If everything did, you’d be out of a job.” — Mosher’s Law of Software Engineering, Attributed to Mosher

64. “A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history — with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.” — Mitch Ratcliffe, Technology Journalist

65. “Why is it drug addicts and computer aficionados are both called users?” — Robin Williams, Actor and Comedian

66. “Design is not just what it looks like and feels like. Design is how it works.” — Steve Jobs, Co-founder of Apple Inc.

67. “Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.” — Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft

68. “Talk is cheap. Show me the code.” — Linus Torvalds, Creator of Linux

69. “A good programmer is someone who always looks both ways before crossing a one-way street.” — Doug Linder, Programmer and Humorist

70. “The function of good software is to make the complex appear to be simple.” — Grady Booch, Software Engineer

71. “It’s not computer literacy that we should be working on, it’s human literacy. Computers have to become human-literate.” — Nicholas Negroponte, MIT Media Lab Founder

72. “Computers are good at following instructions, but not at reading your mind.” — Donald Knuth, Computer Scientist

73. “There is nothing quite so permanent as a temporary software patch.” — Anonymous, Widely shared tech humor

74. “The Web does not just connect machines, it connects people.” — Tim Berners-Lee, Inventor of the World Wide Web

75. “A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it’s not that good.” — Martin LeBlanc, Designer and Entrepreneur

76. “The goal of computer science is to build something that will last at least until we’ve finished building it.” — Anonymous, Engineering Humor

77. “If you automate a mess, you get an automated mess.” — Rod Michael, Tech Manager

78. “Program testing can be used to show the presence of bugs, but never to show their absence!” — Edsger Dijkstra, Mathematician and Programmer

79. “Innovation is the ability to see change as an opportunity — not a threat.” — Steve Jobs, Co-founder of Apple Inc.

80. “You can’t just ask customers what they want and then try to give that to them. By the time you get it built, they’ll want something new.” — Steve Jobs, Co-founder of Apple Inc.

81. “A great programmer is not someone who writes great code but someone who understands and solves real problems.” — Rasmus Lerdorf, Creator of PHP

82. “The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.” — Anonymous, Programming Joke

83. “The best way to get a project done faster is to start sooner.” — Jim Highsmith, Software Developer and Agile Expert

84. “An algorithm must be seen to be believed.” — Donald Knuth, Computer Scientist

85. “Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.” — Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft

86. “We are moving from a world where computing power was scarce to a place where it is almost limitless.” — Eric Schmidt, Former CEO of Google

87. “If people never did silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done.” — Ludwig Wittgenstein, Philosopher

88. “If it weren’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.” — Rita Mae Brown, Author (often quoted in tech circles)

89. “The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain.” — Scotty (James Doohan), Star Trek Engineer

90. “There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don’t believe this to be a coincidence.” — Jeremy S. Anderson, Programmer and Humorist

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91. “As a programmer, it’s your job to put yourself out of a job—by automating everything.” — Max Howell, Creator of Homebrew

92. “Software and cathedrals are much the same — first we build them, then we pray.” — Sam Redwine, Computer Scientist

93. “Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.” — Jeff Pesis, Software Developer

94. “There’s no place like 127.0.0.1.” — Anonymous, Classic Developer Humor

95. “The question of whether computers can think is like the question of whether submarines can swim.” — Edsger Dijkstra, Mathematician and Programmer

96. “Technology is best when it brings people together.” — Matt Mullenweg, Co-founder of WordPress

97. “To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.” — Paul R. Ehrlich, Biologist

98. “Once a new technology rolls over you, if you’re not part of the steamroller, you’re part of the road.” — Stewart Brand, Writer and Futurist

99. “There’s an app for that… and a bug too.” — Anonymous, Tech Humor

100. “The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before.” — Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft

101. “The human spirit must prevail over technology.” — Albert Einstein, Theoretical Physicist

102. “All of my software has documentation. If not, the code is the documentation.” — Anonymous, Developer’s Joke

103. “Tech will not replace teachers, but teachers who use tech will probably replace those who don’t.” — David Warlick, Educator and Technologist

104. “Java is to JavaScript what car is to carpet.” — Chris Heilmann, Web Developer and Author

105. “You can have data without information, but you cannot have information without data.” — Daniel Keys Moran, Computer Programmer and Author

106. “The biggest danger of AI is that people conclude too early that they understand it.” — Eliezer Yudkowsky, AI Researcher

107. “The cloud is just someone else’s computer.” — Anonymous, Tech Community Saying

108. “Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window.” — Steve Wozniak, Co-founder of Apple Inc.

109. “Technology made large populations possible; large populations now make technology indispensable.” — Joseph Wood Krutch, Writer and Naturalist

110. “Code never lies, comments sometimes do.” — Ron Jeffries, Agile Manifesto Co-author

111. “There’s always one more bug.” — Lubarsky’s Law of Cybernetic Entomology, Popular Programming Adage

112. “First, solve the problem. Then, write the code.” — John Johnson, Computer Scientist

113. “Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant.” — Mitchell Kapor, Software Designer

114. “If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.” — Gerald Weinberg, Computer Scientist

115. “One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man.” — Elbert Hubbard, Writer and Philosopher

116. “Technology is the campfire around which we tell our stories.” — Laurie Anderson, Multimedia Artist

117. “Without requirements or design, programming is the art of adding bugs to an empty text file.” — Louis Srygley, Developer Humorist

118. “It’s not that we use technology, we live technology.” — Godfrey Reggio, Film Director

119. “Every time you call tech support, they just Google it too.” — Anonymous, Tech Reality Humor

120. “In software, the most beautiful code, the most beautiful functions, and the most beautiful programs are sometimes not there at all.” — Jon Bentley, Computer Scientist

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121. “Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.” — Albert Einstein, Theoretical Physicist (attributed)

122. “Good code is its own best documentation.” — Steve McConnell, Software Engineer and Author

123. “The most disastrous thing that you can ever learn is your first programming language.” — Alan Kay, Computer Scientist

124. “Computers are like Old Testament gods: lots of rules and no mercy.” — Joseph Campbell, Mythologist and Writer

125. “The best minds of my generation are thinking about how to make people click ads.” — Jeff Hammerbacher, Data Scientist, early Facebook Engineer

126. “Your most unhappy customers are your greatest source of learning.” — Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft

127. “Technology is anything that wasn’t around when you were born.” — Alan Kay, Computer Scientist

128. “If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.” — Edsger Dijkstra, Mathematician and Programmer

129. “Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.” — Andy Rooney, Journalist and Commentator

130. “Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code.” — Anonymous, Developer Humor

131. “The Internet? Is that thing still around?” — Homer Simpson, Fictional Character

132. “Software developers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.” — Anonymous, Tech Humor

133. “In God we trust, all others must bring data.” — W. Edwards Deming, Statistician and Engineer

134. “It’s not a bug — it’s an undocumented feature.” — Anonymous, Classic Tech Humor

135. “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” — Douglas Adams, Author of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

136. “Simplicity is the soul of efficiency.” — Austin Freeman, Author

137. “There is no place like home, except 127.0.0.1.” — Anonymous, Programmer Humor

138. “The real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.” — B.F. Skinner, Psychologist

139. “The only people who have anything to fear from free software are those whose products are worth even less.” — David Emery, Open Source Advocate

140. “Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.” — Pablo Picasso, Artist

141. “I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.” — Isaac Asimov, Author and Futurist

142. “Technology is a word that describes something that doesn’t work yet.” — Douglas Adams, Author

143. “Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.” — John Woods, Software Engineer

144. “There are two types of people: those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.” — Anonymous, Programming Joke

145. “One man’s crappy software is another man’s full-time job.” — Jessica Gaston, Software Engineer

146. “If at first you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0.” — Anonymous, Product Development Humor

147. “Software is like entropy: it is difficult to grasp, weighs nothing, and obeys the Second Law of Thermodynamics; i.e., it always increases.” — Norman Augustine, Aerospace Executive

148. “The goal is to turn data into information, and information into insight.” — Carly Fiorina, Former CEO of HP

149. “Big data is at the foundation of all the megatrends that are happening today, from social to mobile to the cloud to gaming.” — Chris Lynch, Venture Capitalist

150. “The great myth of our times is that technology is communication.” — Libby Larsen, Composer

151. “Why do we never have time to do it right, but always have time to do it over?” — Anonymous, Engineering Wisdom

152. “The best way to predict the future is to invent it.” — Alan Kay, Computer Scientist

153. “To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart… and a bug tracker.” — Eleanor Roosevelt, Modified for Tech Humor

154. “The computer is a moron.” — Peter Drucker, Management Consultant

155. “The only thing more expensive than writing software is writing bad software.” — Anonymous, Developer Wisdom

156. “First law of computers: To err is human. To blame it on a computer is even more human.” — Robert Orben, Speechwriter and Humorist

157. “All technology should be assumed guilty until proven innocent.” — David Brower, Environmentalist

158. “If you think math is hard, try web design.” — Trish Parr, Web Designer

159. “I think there’s a world market for maybe five computers.” — Thomas Watson, Former Chairman of IBM

160. “Innovation is hard because ‘solving problems people didn’t know they had’ and ‘building something no one needs’ look identical at first.” — Aaron Levie, Co-founder of Box

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161. “Technology is best when it brings people together… unless it’s a group chat with 73 unread messages.” — Matt Mullenweg, Co-founder of WordPress

162. “Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window.” — Steve Wozniak, Co-founder of Apple

163. “The Cloud is just someone else’s computer.” — Richard Stallman, Founder of the Free Software Movement

164. “The number one cause of computer problems is the user.” — Craig Bruce, Software Developer

165. “The computer was born to solve problems that did not exist before.” — Bill Gates, Co-founder of Microsoft

166. “I think my phone is broken… it actually made a phone call.” — Dave Barry, Humorist

167. “Rebooting is just a fancy way of turning it off and on again.” — Chris O’Dowd, Actor (The IT Crowd)

168. “You can’t make anything idiot-proof because idiots are so ingenious.” — Anonymous, Developer Humor

169. “Hardware: the part of a computer you can kick.” — Jeff Pesis, Tech Author

170. “Java is to JavaScript what car is to carpet.” — Chris Heilmann, Web Developer

171. “If brute force doesn’t solve your problems, then you’re not using enough.” — Mark Rushton, Systems Architect

172. “Tech support: Because ‘magic’ isn’t a valid job title.” — Anonymous, IT Specialist Humor

173. “Email is the greatest thing ever—except when it’s not.” — Elon Musk, CEO of Tesla & SpaceX

174. “In software, we rarely celebrate things working correctly, only when they stop breaking.” — Grady Booch, Software Engineer

175. “Program testing can be used to show the presence of bugs, but never to show their absence.” — Edsger Dijkstra, Computer Scientist

176. “I don’t need a hard disk in my computer if I can get to the server faster.” — Steve Jobs, Co-founder of Apple

177. “I finally got 8 hours of sleep. Took four hours last night and four today.” — Anonymous, Remote Developer

178. “There’s no place like 127.0.0.1.” — Anonymous, Network Engineer

179. “Why did the developer go broke? Because he used up all his cache.” — Anonymous, Programmer Joke

180. “Any fool can use a computer. Many do.” — Ted Nelson, Tech Pioneer

181. “You know you’re a techie when your bedtime is dictated by server maintenance windows.” — Anonymous, SysAdmin Humor

182. “CAPTCHA: Turning computers into annoying gatekeepers since forever.” — Anonymous, UX Designer

183. “Ctrl+Z is life’s greatest gift—if only it worked outside computers.” — Anonymous, Graphic Designer

184. “The more I learn about people, the more I like my Wi-Fi.” — Anonymous, Tech Hermit

185. “A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.” — Emo Philips, Comedian

186. “I changed my password to ‘incorrect.’ So whenever I forget it, the computer tells me, ‘Your password is incorrect.’” — Anonymous, Life Hacker

187. “Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of tapes hurtling down the highway.” — Andrew Tanenbaum, Computer Scientist

188. “Just because something doesn’t do what you planned it to do doesn’t mean it’s useless.” — Thomas Edison, Inventor

189. “Tech will never replace humans. But it will replace humans who resist learning tech.” — DigitalDefynd, Learning Platform

190. “The future is already here—it’s just not very evenly distributed.” — William Gibson, Author

191. “A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it’s not that good.” — Martin LeBlanc, Designer

192. “Welcome to the cloud! We’ve got uptime, latency, and emotional instability.” — Anonymous, DevOps Humor

193. “Nothing makes you feel more out of control than a Zoom meeting that won’t end.” — Anonymous, Remote Team Manager

194. “There are 10 types of people in the world—those who understand binary and those who don’t.” — Anonymous, Geek Joke

195. “Your call is very important to us. Please enjoy this 40-minute flute solo.” — Anonymous, Customer Service Humor

196. “Never ask a barber if you need a haircut. Never ask a software engineer if your app needs refactoring.” — Anonymous, Tech Consultant

197. “You had me at ‘automated.’ You lost me at ‘permanently deleted.’” — Anonymous, Cloud Storage Victim

198. “I fear the day that technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.” — Albert Einstein, Theoretical Physicist (widely attributed)

199. “If you’re not paying for the product, you are the product.” — Tristan Harris, Tech Ethicist

200. “Computers are like air conditioners—they work fine until you open Windows.” — Anonymous, Classic Tech Joke

Related: Alternative Career Paths for Technology Leaders

Conclusion

Technology may drive progress, but it also delivers endless opportunities for laughter—from awkward Zoom moments to mysterious printer failures and autocorrect disasters. As we’ve seen through these humorous quotes and jokes, even the brightest minds in tech appreciate the absurdities that come with innovation.

At DigitalDefynd, we believe that humor is a powerful way to connect with technology. It helps us stay grounded, sharpens perspective, and reminds us that even in an era of automation and AI, a good laugh remains profoundly human. Whether you’re a developer debugging your 99th error or a CEO juggling cloud migrations, don’t forget to reboot your sense of humor along the way.